I still remember,
That handsome guy, back in third grade.
The way he used to sit close to me,
And always ask for my help.
The way he used to blabber about all those
Star wars movies
And the way I used to pretend I understood all of it.
I still remember his ocean eyes,
And wrinkled smile.
I even remember the funny way I used to love
Going to school, only for him.
I recall the dream.
The way I used to feel when I was near him,
Like the whole world was mine.
How I even thought of forever,
But this was too absurd to even be called love.
When I think of
the unbearable hot days,
How it looked like all the birds and plants are dead,
Or at least dying,
The stranger guy with his melancholic voice,
Comes into my mind.
His stories about the love of his life,
How he likes his sandwiches in the morning,
Even though I never asked.
2 days and 2 nights,
With lots of wine.
That’s all I ever got.
I don’t need to remember this last one,
He still appears in front of me sometimes.
The furious sex,
The insane poems
All about ANGELS, GODS, yes all in upper case.
He was the lover of everyone
And no one.
I never believed in GOD but listening to him
I wasn’t so sure.
I think I loved him, like the way you can love
Someone you never touch.
Maybe I would still be loving him,
If I didn’t get tired of all the games we played.
Now I look at myself,
In dirty, unwashed for three months, mirrors
Most of the times I don’t know myself,
Most of the times I wonder why the hell
Do mirrors exist?
And I break all of them.
I feel better when everything is in disorder.
Oh those rare times,
In those rain afternoons,
Where I settle for a cup of coffee,
I don’t need mirrors to see
I don’t need strangers,
And arms of one love
To tell me I’m beautiful.
Even though it is much pleasant to hear your name
Whispered in the dark
By voices you don’t recognize in the morning,
It is pleasant too,
To drink your coffee,
Not give a fuck about the world,
And for the first time ever,
To feel love.
Love for your coffee,
And your own soul.